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A Whole New World

It’s been almost a month since we were officially licensed, yet this is my first post since we have been inundated with foster care up to our necks. Our lives will never be the same again, I can tell you that with absolute certainty.

We got the call at 2:05pm on April 25th that we were licensed! We waited and waited and waited for the phone to ring with a placement. No dice. It wasn’t until we were about 5 minutes from home from an evening out that we got a call. Shortly after midnight, we had a tiny, scared bundle of cuteness in our arms. He was a 20-month old boy who had a twin sister and older brother that had to go to other homes that night. He didn’t say a word or make a sound all evening as I fed him applesauce and Beautiful put him down to bed. Well, that’s when he screamed. I went in and rubbed his back until he calmed down and we had a different boy the next day. Man, was he ever fun!

At 3pm, I was upstairs getting work done when I got a call from his case manager who said that they went to court and he was being taken home! I stopped working and went down to play with him until he left. I hadn’t been downstairs more than 30 minutes when I got a call from placement saying they had a 33-month old boy who would be arriving at the airport after dinner and they knew we’d have an empty bed by then. We fed our first one dinner, put him in the van for his ride home, and sat around until our next one came after 10pm.

This one came with a happy meal of nuggets and a box of juice. We quickly learned that he likes apple juice and his blue monkey, which he calls Bear. Since we can’t post photos, just picture young Anakin Skywalker from Episode One and you’re not too far off. Adorable. It hasn’t been until this week that he’s started to show his other side – undoubtedly some combination of early trauma and the Terrible Twos. We finally had to use timeouts today, but he fully cooperates with them and is all hugs and kisses when his 2 minutes are up, so we may have found something that works (sparingly) for him rather effortlessly.

He will be with us for a few months, but we face a challenge each week after he has family visitation. This week, we’ve had the added joy of a surprise visitation yesterday, so we are prepared for an unrelenting barrage of strange to bad behavior. When he’s good, our hearts melt. When he’s bad, we have to use every ounce of the training we’ve had to decide one of two things quickly and unanimously:

  • do we treat this as parents of a toddler or
  • do we treat this as parents of a severely traumatized little boy who just needs love a million miles before he needs discipline, even if the discipline is a quiet rebuke that hitting is not nice (he clearly doesn’t understand “we prefer you do x, y, or z”)

Getting my work done has been a challenge, but this is what we signed up for, so we are continually working as a team to find our happy medium where I’m involved but able to leave to go upstairs to work. We are tired and exhausted beyond what we thought possible. I am, especially, because I have an engrained sense of responsibility to fix everything, so I’m constantly analyzing him to gain an edge into his mind, figuring out why he did something, what he is thinking, and exactly what happened to him in the past. I’ve gone from crying over what I’ve been told to absolute rage over the knowledge that someone did something to this precious boy in diapers when he was even younger than this. I have to rest in the promise of renewal for those who want it. People can change.

I can assure you new dads of one thing: you will absolutely feel like the king of the world when you come home to a toddler running all the way across the room with his face hidden behind a smile and screaming “Daddy, daddy, daddy, daddy!” the whole way. Nothing compares.

Now that you’ve been caught up, I can resume writing snippets of our lives and how CF fits in with foster parenting and running a fully-booked business. Oh! I’ve started walking again in the morning. I supposed you may have guessed that from the photo.

You Want to Eat Like Me?

You Want to Eat Like Me?

To embed this Fatboy Shareable on your own site, just copy and paste the code below into your blog post or web page … or share it with your social network with the buttons above the Sharable.

If you’ve got cystic fibrosis, then you’ve heard this or something like it before:

“I wish I could eat like you without becoming a fat cow.”

As for me, I’ve heard it well over 100 times in my 33 years on this planet. I know people don’t mean anything disrespectful by it, but put it in perspective using another issue.

It’s like telling someone in a wheelchair that it must be nice to not have to stand in a long line.

Surround yourself with those who understand or educate those who do care about you that saying such things hurt your feelings. They’ll understand.

If they don’t, they’re not someone you want to have close enough to influence your thinking.

Turning Back the Clock

Turning back the clockYesterday was my hospitalization follow-up from my blockage at the beginning of March. We’ve been really looking forward to it to see how much impact Spiriva and my exercising has made on my PFTs.

If you’ve been following some of my posts on Facebook, I’ve walked and ran 60.9 miles in 60 days. I started by just walking 1/2 mile. Then I upped it to 1 mile and soon added running 100′ or so for a week. Then I upped to 200′ for a week. I’m now able to run (a good 8-minute mile pace) for 1/4 mile and several shorter jogs on my 1.5 mile route. Some days are just for walking and taking photos at an easy pace, just to get out and clear my mind.

I love my new routine, but how much does it like me?

I was really pumped to get my PFT results, so we made our guesses ahead of time. I said I felt like a 46% and Beautiful said 40%. She was saving 42% for me because those who know me know I’m a Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy fan, so 42 is my favorite number, so she changed her guess to 42% when I didn’t claim it.

I took my first blow somewhat relaxed so I didn’t tighten up and constrict my flow.

39% – my number twice in 2011 and my second to last result. Not bad, up from 35%.

Then I decided to give it a huge effort and blow as hard as I could.

40%

For my last blow, I concentrated on keeping everything wide and open [Read more…]

American Idol Season 11 – Top 12 Predictions

Well, wasn’t that exciting?! Jermaine Jones has been booted from the competition due to multiple outstanding warrants for his arrest in New Jersey. I can just imagine how those cops were gnashing their teeth to see him living the high life on national TV in Los Angeles. We were both surprised that there weren’t cops waiting for him outside his hotel to extradite him. The judges say that one still has to go tonight in a field that is now down to 11. Neither of us are really sure that will be the case, since doing so would mean that their broadcast schedule will be out of whack if they don’t skip one week, but they may very well do that later in the season, if not tonight.

We also hotly debated the return of last week’s non-save of Jeremy Rosado. I’d love to see him come back because I wanted Jermaine to leave last week – such a shame! Shameful!

On to the performances in 2 categories: Hot and Not.

Hot (in order of hotness to “not-ness”)

Hollie Cavanaugh – Girl, did you just blow a Celine Dion song out of the box or what?! Utterly speechless. I just got full body goosebumps again as I watched the video I’m embedding below.

 Joshua Ledet – That was nearly as good as Hollie. The judges thought it was the best thing since sliced bread, but I think his motions are just a little out of control. Going solely on audio, though, they were neck and neck.

Erika Van Pelt – Her hair totally transformed her appearance and her voice was from another world from the last two weeks’ performances. She’s back in the race.

Colton Dixon – I loved this rendition of a song I’ve never heard of. It was done just the way it should be done: performance first. It was end of the season quality. I pulled the Dawg’s “what? what?” twice during the song.

Phillip Phillips – I think that he’s got a mild mutation of CF. First, he was born with 4″ of his small intestine dead. Then they showed that he nonchalantly told Jimmy and will.i.am that he was going to surgery (that practice night) for kidney stones and then performed without a hitch. He’s gotta be a CFer… what a trooper.

Not

Heejun Han – My season’s dude favorite fell on his face with this one. That’s one of my favorite 80s songs and it just wasn’t his style. I hope he sticks around, but he’s going to have to rely on fan votes, not popular votes.

Jessica Sanchez – The song was too fast and was totally not a good fit. When will people learn to pick songs that fit them? /sigh Such a fall from grace that she earned last week.

Elise Testone – I predict that the duet with Obama will be Elise’s death knell. Is it too much to ask to not have politics thrown in our face during our most treasured leisure activities? Apparently so.

Deandre Brackensick – He just makes me sick. When is he going to get out of his boy voice. I actually said something a lot meaner last night, but Beautiful said it was too mean for public consumption. I’ll just say that if he hits that falsetto again, I’ll give him a reason to sing that high, because he’s an embarrassment to men everywhere.

In trouble

Heejun, Elise, Jessica

Going home

Elise Testone

A Whole New World

It's been almost a month since we were officially licensed, yet this is my first post since we have been inundated with foster care up to our necks. Our lives will never be the same again, I can tell you that with absolute certainty. We got the … [Read more]

You Want to Eat Like Me?

To embed this Fatboy Shareable on your own site, just copy and paste the code below into your blog post or web page ... or share it with your social network with the buttons above the Sharable. Like this graphic? Inspire me with a comment. If … [Read more]

Turning Back the Clock

Yesterday was my hospitalization follow-up from my blockage at the beginning of March. We've been really looking forward to it to see how much impact Spiriva and my exercising has made on my PFTs. If you've been following some of my posts on … [Read more]

American Idol Season 11 – Top 12 Predictions

Well, wasn't that exciting?! Jermaine Jones has been booted from the competition due to multiple outstanding warrants for his arrest in New Jersey. I can just imagine how those cops were gnashing their teeth to see him living the high life on … [Read more]