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I Like Having a Personal Nurse and Getting Shot

ShotIt’s been a few months now, and Beautiful has taken over giving me my testosterone injections for me since it’s so much more tolerable in my butt than in my thigh. I highly recommend it for anyone who has someone around to do simple maintenance stuff like this, but I don’t recommend pissing them off right before it’s time for your dose. 😉

Our first intro to doing it was when we went to clinic and asked Sue if a nurse could show Beautiful how to find a good placement. If I had known it was this simple, we might not have bothered. Here’s how it went: “Grab his butt [grabbed as much of a handful as she could] and shoot him anywhere.” “Does it matter where in what you grab?” “Nope, butt is butt. Anywhere is good. He obviously doesn’t have a lot of depth to work with [thanks], so aim for the thickest part.”

I was cracking up having my shorts halfway down one side with a nurse with gloves feeling me up holding on to a chunk of my butt for 15 seconds while Beautiful watched as the nurse then shoved a 1.5″ needle in to the hilt. Yes, I was still smiling, because nurse shots almost never hurt and it was funny to see Beautiful’s reaction to such a violent stab.

For reals

So, the next week, it was time for her audition. She did good, but suffice it to say that she needed to work out how to hold the syringe to be able to draw back to check for blood and still squeeze it in, too. After that got figured out the next week, it has mainly been getting over the fear of hurting me. Truth is, it only hurts if 1) it hits a nerve or 2) you don’t thrust hard enough to break the skin. You can’t do anything about hitting a nerve, but not breaking through the skin is my only hesitation now.

She hasn’t failed on the stab for about a month now, so that fear is mostly gone. It does take some getting used to having a non-nurse do something with a needle that long, but maybe a nice uniform would help some people. Hey, it could be fun!

She does a REALLY great job for someone so new to all of this medical stuff. She sort of knew what she was getting into when she said “yes,” but I’m sure you can’t ever really know what it’s like to live with a CFer and deal with things that we deal with.

Imagine all that she’s done for me in the last 5 years:

I know that not everyone’s family can step up to do things like she has, but I highly recommend it if they are willing to try. It’s so much better to be loved on with medical care by family than calling in a home health person and dealing with all of that paperwork and bringing someone else into your life. I’ve got to give kudos for Ronnie giving Mandi all those shots (NSFW) in the rear a few months ago… and videoing it from 2 angles for our amusement. Go check it out if you haven’t seen it.

They Are Leaving on a BIG Jet Plane


Photo credit:

Tonight (tomorrow) at midnight, we are packing up with my best man and his girlfriend and the 4 of us are driving from Tampa to the Cape to watch the second to last shuttle launch Monday morning just before 9am. We’ve got Beautiful’s allergy-free snacks, ham, juices, and chicken salad packed along with my Newtons, Oreos, Boosts, drinks, and hard-boiled eggs… along with caffeine pills for all of the driving at strange, sleep-deprived hours.

I did my evening treatments on time after dinner tonight and am feeling great, but I’ll bring my inhalers along and we should be back around lunchtime tomorrow, so I’ll do my treatments when we return home rather than pack all of that extra stuff and scrounge up batteries for my Trio and Altera. I may not get enough calories during the first part of the day, but I’ll make up for it later.

STS-134 launchpadWe are pretty excited because this is the first time we get to spend any time with his girlfriend and it’s been pretty long-term, but she is attending college in Chicago, so he’s moving up to the area to be a paramedic with the CFD this summer. It will be our first and last chance to spend any time with them as a couple, and we are really looking forward to seeing who’s got my best man all knackered. I’ve known him since he was about 10 years old, but now he’s 25 and has me by more than a head in height and a good 50lbs. I was his youth group mentor back in the day, so seeing him like this, well, it gets me choked up. Just don’t tell him I told you.

We’ll have plenty of photos and video posted sometime tomorrow here and over at Kristinology, so until we return, have a great night.

The Great Killer of Busy CFers: Stress

OverwhelmedSome days I feel like I’m dying. Other days I feel great.

It is the great killer of busy CFers. Stress!

I’ve never handled stress well, physically, although I have found myself to mentally thrive on massive amounts of stress. In fact, Beautiful has told me (on a number of occasions) that she knows I’m stressing out about something – often something I’m not able to put my finger on for a number of days – when I begin to take on more and more things while she’s fully aware that I’m overworked. I guess for me, it’s not really the stress itself, but how I cope with stress: exertion.

Maybe I was called “lazy” too many times as a kid or teen, I don’t know, but I do know you won’t find anyone who knows me now that could say that with a grain of truth. I’ve come to realize that enough is enough and too much really does have a physical effect on me. My greatest example: the last few months before we got married almost killed me.

I really couldn’t have been any happier, but anyone who’s gone through the whole wedding process knows it’s stressful, even for the groom because he’s got a stressed out bride, parents, and in-laws. Make it a 4-month engagement, and you’re asking Fatboy to get sick, and sick I did. In 2006, I was on IVs 4 times before the end of October, on home O2 for a month, and had my port placed 3 weeks before our wedding. I was working 40-60 hours per week with some hair-brained idea of trying to be “worthy” to marry Beautiful, as if I still had anything to prove after she said, “yes.” More on this later.

Our next example is when we moved to our new house. I was on IVs within a couple of weeks after we were “settled.” The packing, moving, unpacking, and adjusting to life in a new space didn’t sit well with my immune system. IVs again when I got unjustly let go and spiraled into a good 3-month depression and drawn out sickness. Again when I was in full swing with college and running my business. I didn’t have a spare moment as I was up by 5:30 and often working or doing homework past midnight. I narrowly escaped IVs last Spring for graduation – an incident that we are convinced was because I was fully compliant and on such a high-calorie diet that I was able to cushion myself enough.

So, here I am again. Stressed.

We’ve had plans to meet with our marriage mentors for weeks, but someone or another keeps getting too busy or sick, so we finally get to meet with them tomorrow night after dinner. Maybe they’ll have some creative ideas since they also both work from home in a situation similar to ours, except she also home-schools their 3 daughters while he works at the computer like I do.

We do our best to take off quality time to do things that we enjoy, but with the ups and downs of business, it’s easy when it’s a great month but time off during a scarce month just adds to my stress rather than relieving it.

We have 2 weeks until we fly to SoCal for my first trip to Cali, and I am very much looking forward to R&R at the resort and very much dreading the anxiety of not working.

I need to relax.

One day I’ll figure out how. I just want it to be on my terms…

Happy Birthday, Beautiful



Today is the day I most look forward to each year. Beautiful thinks my birthday is my fave, but it’s really hers. Sure, I get excited about mine out of celebration of kicking CF’s butt one more year and seeing what she has secretly planned behind my back, but I get more of a kick doing whatever the heck she wants and trying to surprise her.

This year has been a roller coaster on many fronts (mostly related to stress in one way or another from one source or another), but a combination of dedication and stubbornness on both our parts has us ready to take on the next 8 months of 2011 with a vengeance! So, while today may not be the most well-planned day we’ve ever had, we are sure to have fun… and I’ll see if I can slip in some surprises along the way. She thinks I don’t plan things because I’m so good at actually freaking out about some things (like presents she asks for) but she doesn’t see scheming. Yes, Babe, I scheme about your big day, too.

Since you’re reading this, presumably before I wake up, don’t rush, but let’s try to leave a little early, pack our lunch like planned, wear street clothes over our beachwear, and take a detour to eat. I am pretty sure you’ll like it.

Take a walk with me down memory lane…

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